Five Ways to Protect Your Mental Health while Going through a Divorce
Divorce can undoubtedly be one of the most stressful life events that many adults find themselves in after years of marriage. While there is no doubt that major changes on the horizon, there are at least five things you can do to protect your mental health when going through the divorce process. This blog will give you some recommendations of things to consider to help make the process more seamless.
1.) Seek Professional Mental Health Services
First, we recommend finding a therapist or counselor to help you through all of the emotional turmoil that can come with making decisions in getting divorced. Most of our clients are from Oakland County and Macomb County, and we have developed a wide network of local therapists and counselors that are clients rave about. We are happy to give you some recommendations. Unlike friends and family, a therapist can look at the situation from a bird’s-eye-view and give you truly objective ideas on how to look at the situation you may find yourself in.
A therapist is a great person to have in your corner because they have no personal vested interest in the outcome of your decisions. Therefore, they can truly help you weigh the pros and cons and evaluate the decisions in front of you. In addition, they can provide the support you need and ideas for more coping mechanisms. Many times, we encourage our clients to find mental health professionals because as lawyers, we are not mental health professionals, and we really end up being very expensive friends.
2.) Try Meditation
Second, we recommend that everyone try a meditation practice, such as breathing exercises, to help with anxiety, dealing with the unknown of the future, and stress management. Taking 10 minutes to do a meditation can have a profound effect after just a couple of days. We work with an energy healer, Lexlee Overon, who has provided us with a number of excellent meditations that we recommend trying. She also has breathing exercises and a number of free resources on her website.
3.) Focus on Yourself
Third, we recommend that our clients focus on themselves and the future in front of them. Looking through the social media of your soon-to-be-ex only creates stress and questions that will cause useless anxiety. When we are representing someone going through a divorce, we have a person working in our office who tracks the social media activity in case there is anything important for the case. Focusing on yourself and your future is really the best way you can serve yourself positively in the end.
4.) Only Confide in Trusted Loved Ones
Fourth, we recommend that our clients limit their network of trusted people so that they are not getting advice from a number of different sources. While many people have good intentions, many times they are talking about highly specific situations and strategies that are unique to what they went through or what someone they know went through. Leave the advice and strategy sessions to your lawyer. In Oakland County and Macomb County in particular, judges like specific arguments more than others and expect people to behave in certain ways. We can make sure to give you clear direction on how to handle yourself throughout the divorce. Take what anyone else says with a grain of salt.
5.) Make Gratitude a Top Priority
Fifth, we encourage all of our divorce clients to begin a gratitude practice. By focusing on little things that we are grateful for each day, it causes a positive mindshift and makes a tremendous difference in your mental health during a divorce. When going through a divorce, you will find things that may be unexpected positive changes to your life. For example, while we all love time with our children, many find that they also appreciate their nights without their children. Suddenly, they have the ability to make plans, be flexible, and do things for themselves that they normally could not do. Focusing on each aspect of life and finding gratitude in the little things will help you look at the divorce process in a positive light.
Clients often come to us overwhelmed with grief, sadness, confusion, and uncertainty about what the future holds. While these emotions are real, they are not productive and often spill over onto your children. We can tell you that after handling hundreds of divorces, not one of our clients has come back and regretted the decision or the outcome. Many will tell us they will never get married again, but we often see on social media in a few months that they have met the person of their dreams. Please call us with all of your questions today. Divorce can be manageable. We will help walk you through the process and make sure you are not completely overwhelmed.
